Dear {{first_name}}, Our beloved teacher Morah Yehudis forwarded an email with the subject line from this quote by the neuroscientist Dr. Rick Hanson "The brain is like Velcro for negative experiences, but Teflon for positive ones." It is an article that suggests that out of the approximately 12,000-60,000 thoughts per day of the average person, 80% of them are negative, and that 95% are repetitive! This concept is probably not new to most of us, especially those of us who spend too much time dwelling on the one negative comment or experience out of many positive ones. It impacts our perceptions of the world, our relationships with others and our environment.
This Sunday marks the beginning of the three week period of mourning that culminates with Tisha b'Av where we commemorate the destruction of the first and second Temples in Jerusalem along with other tragic events in our history. The traditional understanding of the cause of all this, is the dark force of "sinat chinam" - causeless hatred among the community. Finding faults in others and reasons to hate rather than love, is an expression of the negative thought patterns projected on to others. HaRav Kook, the first chief rabbi of Palestine, taught that the antidote to sinat chinam (causeless hatred) is ahavat chinam (causeless love.) Just as the way to counter a Velcro negative thought is a conscious practice of cultivating a positive one, so too we can cultivate the practice of finding traits and qualities in others to help us love them rather than judge and hate them. Of course the ultimate and hardest for many of us, is to apply this practice to our own self-judgments.
The pagan prophet Bilam is hired by the Moabite King Balak to curse the Israelites in their camp, but ends up blessing them with words so powerful the became part of the daily morning liturgy said on entering a sanctuary - "mah tovu ohalecha Yaakov - how goodly are your tents oh Jacob, your dwelling places Israel." Rabbi Jonathan Sacks writes of this narrative from this week's parsha, named after that king, Balak, "God is teaching us that love can turn curses into blessings. It is the only force capable of defeating hate. Love heals the wounds of the world."
There is so much pain, negativity and destruction in the world right now and on this Shabbat of Parshat Balak, leading us into the three weeks, may we all find ways to transform the negative into positive, the curses into blessings!
I am so grateful to be spending this Shabbat right on the shores of the River Crouch on the east coast of England where I learned to love the water and all of its gifts and blessings, especially as an intense heat wave hits London this weekend! Thank you to Rabbi Charna Rosenholtz, Daniel Turgel, Jason Blau, Kai and Danny Sherwinter and others for leading and teaching us this Shabbat at Bonai Shalom.
Shabbat Shalom from the riverbank, Rabbi Marc
Congregation Bonai Shalom 1527 Cherryvale Rd Boulder, CO 80303